Ants Marching...

...and no, I'm not talking about that great Dave Matthews song! I'm talking about the rude little everyday pests called ants, or perhaps more scientifically (if that!) "Argentine" aka 'sugar' ants. We have been battling thousands of them over the past 4 days & I think they finally surrendered, aka kicked the bucket. Whew! Saturday morning, I suited up as team captain (3rd year in a row!) for the annual Arthritis Foundations, Jingle Bell Run...and boy it was cold! However, I had my iPod charged & in place, jingle bells were securely fastened to my shoes, my muscles were semi-warmed up & I was ready to show that course who was boss! Well, maybe not so much 'boss', but that I wasn't going to let those crazy 4-5min mile runners intimidate me. I actually crossed the finish line in 32:18...4 mins better than my previous 5k time! I was flying high...it made me realize that my workout routine was really paying off. However, I think it's time to invest in new running shoes, b/c I was experiencing what I call "Kerrigan knee pain" (like as in Nancy-Kerrigan-clubbed-in-the-knee-feeling-by-Tonya-Harding)kinda pain. However, Rod sees dollar signs & hears a constant 'cha-ching, cha-ching' when I express my need for new running shoes. I'll keep working on him. The ever faithful Team Jingle-Jangle joined in for another year (The Bennett Family & The Brown Family...kids & all! Poor Monica called in sick...we missed you Monica!) too...unfortunately heel pain struck my mom & so she opted to sit this year out (my Dad followed suit)...Rod opted for a warm bed Saturday morning & probably a warmer breakfast (i had none!). When I got back from the race Sophia had a case of the sniffles & wasn't feeling like herself. Nana jumped at the chance to keep her & spoil her in her jammies while Rod & I ventured out to knock out our Christmas shopping. Glad that's over! Mission accomplished - we picked up Sophia & headed home. Cue the ants. Upon opening the pantry door, ants had descended up on our 5 shelves of glorious goodies...I'm talkin they had a map goin on...better than Oregon Trail!! I shrieked & we began dumping any opened packages of food in the trash...they were everywhere. Once under control, I breathed a sigh of relief...but not for long. We treated it with some pest control, but Sunday & Monday we kept seeing stragglers. Gross. Just when we thought we had it beat....they surged with a surprise attack in a woman's most sacred place...her CLOSET! Yes, ladies they were repelling down into my cherished purses & handbags & grappling onto the fabric of my most favorite dresses - I'm pretty sure I was gagging by this point. Rod leapt out of bed to come to my rescue...I'm sure I'm guilty of some choice phrases & expletives, but this was my closet for heaven's sake. After beating those ants into oblivion & 2 loads of laundry later, I was pooped & ready to go to bed. Haha. Third time's the charm. I went to hang a Sophia's towel in her bathroom & became irate (i was beyond tired & angry at this point)when i flipped on the light & discovered this satan-ants had decided to do a tour thru this room too. They were pouring from the sink onto the counter, up thru the medicine cabinet & proceeded to the parade route around the bathroom ceiling...I felt like burning my own house down at this point. God Bless Sophia, b/c out of all the racket Rod & I made she slept thru the entire Ant-War of 2008! By the time we cleaned it all up, it was 1:30am....T minus 4.5hrs and counting before my alarm was set to go off. Great. As I crawled into bed (only after harrassing Rod to douse his feet under running water to ensure no ants having a slumber party in our sheets!) I had this horrific sensation the ants were crawling all over me, my anger & frustration had gotten the better of me. I woke up to find no ants (except the stragglers) & called Cook's Pest Control immediately to set up a little visit! They came, they saw, they conquered! So far, so good....we discovered the ants were traveling up a tree in our front yard, taking a leap of faith onto the roof & passing the attic 'bouncer' throwing a 'peace' sign their way to wave them thru to the hottest ticket in town...our house. Ugh. Thankfully, my Dad, ol' faithful, came to the rescue this morning prior to Cook's, to help me evaluate the post-mid-night war damage. Thanks Dad...you're the best! In the famous words of George Costanza's dad in Seinfeld...."SERENITY NOW"!